Sleep, the update

Night one, kid in the middle of the bed: slept until 5, ate, went back to sleep.

Night 2, same setting, same result.

Night 3, same setting, all hell broke loose.

Listen, people. We’re bordering on a crisis here. The kid was up EVERY. FUCKING. HOUR.

I am wrecked today. NSG is wrecked today. And the kid is McCrabby.  Before I got ahold of myself I even tried to pick a fight with NSG this morning over who was more tired.


I have no idea what happened. He doesn’t seem to be sick, he didn’t have a bad day yesterday. Are we paying for having been away? Is something else going on?

I don’t think I have been this tired since my last all-nighter, which was, um, carry the 6… a LONG time ago. I can hardly see straight.

This morning I composed a blog post in my head that started with something like “Baby for Rent.” Now I’ve had a whole day away from him and don’t feel the need to pawn him off anymore – but I will say that I’m not ready for him to come home, and might not be ready until tomorrow.

Please someone remind me that for every night like this there’s also a sleep-until-5-am night, and good smiles and baby laughs and funny little baby farts. I know it was only 2 nights ago that we had one of those good nights but this one cancelled that one out and right now I don’t believe it will ever happen again.



12 Responses to Sleep, the update

  1. techie says:

    Ouch. Been there. You may want to work out a split shift arrangement. One of you takes the first half of the night and one the other. When you aren’t on you can sleep in a guest room. Sometimes it’s the only way to get some sleep. Good luck

  2. Susan says:

    Yes, yes, yes, it will pass, and someday Roo will probably even be sleeping half the day away as a teenager. And you’ll hardly remember how tired you are now. Hugs. And chamomile tea.

  3. Julie says:

    I’m so sorry. If you can, the split shift thing works for us. Pretty easy for us, though, since J sleeps in his own room–no so easy if he’s sleeping between you and you don’t have a guest room or if you don’t have milk stored.

    Everyone keeps telling me it gets better. That certainly doesn’t help now, but it’s a nice thought 😉

  4. Johnny says:

    Here are some thoughts:

    1) yes, when you travel, you upset the apple cart in terms of their schedule. That’s the price you pay for travel.

    2) one good night does not mean “AHA” the sleep solution is FIXED! It means you got lucky that one night. it’s on going for a few more weeks or months. Sorry.

    3) you’ll reach a point where you are mentally exhausted and afraid of hurting the child with bad judgment due to said lack of sleep. Then, you might finally break down and do the crying-it-out method in a separate bed/crib/room.

  5. alazyknitter says:

    it’s amazing how a few well slept nights can make you completely forget what it’s like to be up all night. Bub didn’t sleep through until he was 2.5 years and after I’d been getting good sleep for a few weeks, he went through a phase of wanting to be attached to the tap all night long again. Oy! I never realized how sleep deprived I was when it was a regular thing. Here’s hoping he balances out again soon and you all can get some much needed zzzzzz’s.

  6. afrindiemum says:

    travel always upsets z’s routine. especially her sleep routine. it’s really hard on her. we’re just now recovering from our last trip. one thing that’s been really good for z is a strictly enforced routine. i’m sorry roo’s sleep’s all messed up. i also know about the desire for sleep versus the desire for partner-snuggles. lack of either or both definitely take their toll on the relationship. it’s hard, but it will pass. everything is a phase – and they pass pretty quickly with babies usually. good luck, whatever you choose to do.

  7. Erin says:

    Travel screws up babies, no two ways about it. Also, he’s 4 months old–could he have started teething? P started teething at 3 months but didn’t get his first tooth until 8 1/2 months old. He didn’t teethe hard at first, just for a day or two here and there, but those were some really rough nights.

    As far as Johnny’s advice to use CIO when you’re utterly exhausted, I have a better one–bring Roo into your bed and conk out. I know you don’t want him there permanently, but it might help get him back into the home routine. Or maybe put him into his crib until his first waking, to give you some snuggle time with NSG, then bring him into bed. Is the bed against the wall? You could put Roo next to it, he’d be happy, and you could snuggle your whole family at once. Or buy a bed rail and use that.

    OK, enough of the assvice from me!

  8. DS-L says:

    Our daughter was up every one or two hours EVERY night for 6 months when she came home from China. It is awful. My lullabies consisted of “go to f***ing sleep” In a very sweet voice but nonetheless. Our solution for snuggling and sleep — we put her crib right up against our bed and removed one rail. the mattresses align. She is safe, and when she squeeks I can pat pat her back before she fully wakes up. Have had this arrangement for a year. Worked in one night, and she now sleeps from 8 pm to 7 am every night. Good luck. I can’t even let my puppy cry it out so I am no help on that front and the boys (9 and 5) slept in our bed until each was 3!

  9. Sue says:

    Painful. I get it. I have never been so aware of how important a night’s sleep is until I became a parent and how one bad night can ruin the next 24-48 hours I think you are getting wise responses, and I know from my own experience that parenting children is like living outdoors. Naked. If you don’t like the weather, it always changes. And it’s a very raw feeling. Hang in there.

    Sue–who, in the first few months, had fantasies of attaching a note to JL that said “take me back to my massis*” and putting her on the next plane to India.

    *means aunties, orphanage caregivers

  10. Sally Bowles says:

    Not sure how crying it out is supposed to be less stressful than responding to a crying child. Cosleeping works for us because it is a low-stress approach. You haven’t said what actually happens when “all hell [breaks] loose”, but I like the suggestion someone made to divide up the work into separate shifts. The situation will change. I would definitely check for teething, maybe even an ear infection if he seems to be crying when lying down.

  11. Clementine says:

    No advice here, just thinking good thoughts. Sleep, Roo, sleep!

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